Today was the most emotional and stressful day of my young life. I’ve known for eight months now that the 24th May heralded my return to the UK, at first an assuring promise of an end to the unfamiliar and daunting but more recently a day, too fast approaching, of upheaval and sadness.
Rwanda is my home. Indeed, I cannot help but feel that it has been kinder to me in this eight months than England ever was. Yes, the UK is an extremely privileged place to grow up in and I am very grateful for the benefit it has given me over the years. But as any visiting foreigner can testify, there is something very cold and harsh about the UK, the culture, the landscape, the weather. I do not despise my homeland, nay, I am very patriotic, but my heart was built for warmer climates and I hope to return to Rwanda soon.
I packed the day full of last minute errands and heart wrenching goodbyes. The past week has been fairly emotional too, saying goodbye to people and places that I’ve come to love. By the morning of the 24th, my nerves were so shot that I felt physically sick. I did not sleep in the night so I was pretty tired as well, and my list of things to do grew harder to achieve as the 4 o clock deadline loomed.
I got up at six for what I thought would be my last bucket shower, and I enjoyed every second of it believing that tomorrow better things were in store for me. After showering I went to Giporoso to pick up some tea and coffee for gifts, but to my frustration the 'supermarket' was still closed. It astounds me that anything could still be closed at 8.00 am in Rwanda, considering that almost everyone, myself excluded, gets up in the morning at 5 am. For what possible reason could the local shop not open until nine?
Well this just added stress to my plate, so I went home, crawled into bed and whimpered for an hour before trying again. Only this time I recruited Karyn to come with me to try and keep me sane. After Giporoso I went into town to change money and buy some gifts from Dora before meeting Isabelle to say our last goodbye. We went to Bourbon for ice cream, and Isabelle cried the whole time we were together. I feel bad about leaving her. She's had a really rough life and she deserves to have a good thing stick around a bit longer. But it was an honour to be her friend and tutor if only for a short while.
Next on the list was to say goodbye to Dora at work and buy some croissants to eat for dinner at the airport. Dora has been a real blessing to me and I love her very much. And I finally got my chocolate balls!
Rwanda is my home. Indeed, I cannot help but feel that it has been kinder to me in this eight months than England ever was. Yes, the UK is an extremely privileged place to grow up in and I am very grateful for the benefit it has given me over the years. But as any visiting foreigner can testify, there is something very cold and harsh about the UK, the culture, the landscape, the weather. I do not despise my homeland, nay, I am very patriotic, but my heart was built for warmer climates and I hope to return to Rwanda soon.
I packed the day full of last minute errands and heart wrenching goodbyes. The past week has been fairly emotional too, saying goodbye to people and places that I’ve come to love. By the morning of the 24th, my nerves were so shot that I felt physically sick. I did not sleep in the night so I was pretty tired as well, and my list of things to do grew harder to achieve as the 4 o clock deadline loomed.
I got up at six for what I thought would be my last bucket shower, and I enjoyed every second of it believing that tomorrow better things were in store for me. After showering I went to Giporoso to pick up some tea and coffee for gifts, but to my frustration the 'supermarket' was still closed. It astounds me that anything could still be closed at 8.00 am in Rwanda, considering that almost everyone, myself excluded, gets up in the morning at 5 am. For what possible reason could the local shop not open until nine?
Well this just added stress to my plate, so I went home, crawled into bed and whimpered for an hour before trying again. Only this time I recruited Karyn to come with me to try and keep me sane. After Giporoso I went into town to change money and buy some gifts from Dora before meeting Isabelle to say our last goodbye. We went to Bourbon for ice cream, and Isabelle cried the whole time we were together. I feel bad about leaving her. She's had a really rough life and she deserves to have a good thing stick around a bit longer. But it was an honour to be her friend and tutor if only for a short while.
Next on the list was to say goodbye to Dora at work and buy some croissants to eat for dinner at the airport. Dora has been a real blessing to me and I love her very much. And I finally got my chocolate balls!
Then we went to Shokola for lunch with the other interns. I had chicken tagine and chapattis for the last time and Mike finally bought me a slice of bereavement cake. He promised it to me when my grandmother died but we've not had a chance to buy it until today.
And of course, it being Tuesday, we went to Ubuzima. I said goodbye to everyone and thanked them for their love and kindness this year. They are such a blessing and challenge to me.
The group surprised me with a portrait of myself and Mama Deborah painted Julienne's husband, and with the patchwork quilt they have been making over the past few months. It's the first one they've ever made, and it's gorgeous. A big, big thank you to everyone involved!
It was very hard for me to leave Ubuzima. These men and women have become a big part of my life and I love them very much. They are such beautiful people and I’m really going to miss them.
Jen rushed me home at four to quickly finish packing before taking me to the airport. Silas came to wave me off, but to my shock and dismay, I did not get far. My flight was not appearing on the departure board, and when Jen went to inquire I heard one word; cancelled. After all this, my flight was cancelled. As I was rearranging my flight for the next day, I found out that it had been cancelled for months but the travel agent had failed to tell me. Brilliant.
As I said, it was a very emotional day.
Jen took me home and I spent the night at Dora's. Mike came over and he, Karyn and I watched TV and had dinner together.
Although the cancellation of my flight was kind of stressful, it actually worked out for the best. Tuesday was a very tense, emotional day and because it was so rushed I had no time to process everything. This way I had more time to reflect on everything and prepare myself for the journey home.
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